What’s good, my guy? Wanna get some pizza on your Timbs? Or we can go up to my studio apartment and smoke the weed I bought from a stranger in Washington Square Park. You wanna go to Times Square? Wait, where all the tourists are? Fuggedaboutit! I’ll just stay here and read some New York tweets instead:

Thank you Buzzfeed for subletting these tweets at a fair price. If you have pride for the smells of New York, you'll also love pictures to remind you that America has always been great and Canadian graffiti that is nicer than anything my mom has ever said to me.

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