Honestly, I Love Nasty Women, Bruh
October 30, 2016
I mean c’mon. When the chicks get nasty I fall in love. No joke bruh. Head over god damn heels. Sorry, am I making you uncomfortable?
Beloved Cat Rescue Service, “Grab ‘Em By The Pussy,” Must Change Name Now
October 20, 2016
“Why, for over forty years we’ve been grabbin’ ‘em by the pussy!” yelped Mick, his youthful exuberance barely recognizable anymore.
Improv Group Begrudgingly Takes “Donald Trump’s Asshole” As A Suggestion
October 17, 2016
“When we formed our troupe, we all took a sacred oath to never do jokes relating to Donald Trump. None of it is funny. None of it is a joke.”
Think Donald Trump’s Tax Returns Are Shocking? You Should See His Blockbuster Video Returns!
October 15, 2016
Can we trust a man with a Blockbuster rental record such as this one? This writer certainly thinks not.
An Open Letter To Pepe The Frog From Your Nephew, Kermit
October 14, 2016
I mean I've never liked you urinating in public and on random objects and people; that’s what drove the Fraggles underground.
Trump’s Sexual Assault Comments Likely Inexcusable Because He’s Not A Varsity Athlete
October 12, 2016
“Trump’s comments are absolutely, quite simply, despicable. He’s neither fast nor strong enough to get away with such disgusting slander.”
Mike Pence Vows To Hunt Down and Exterminate All Remaining Jedi If Trump Wins Election
October 2, 2016
“I just finished constructing my first lightsaber - red, of course - and I've completed all of my training," beamed Pence.