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Glorified Rice Your Aunt

This is something called "glorified rice" - you asked how it's made, and regretted that decision as soon as Pam told you it includes rice, Jell-o, Cool Whip, Maraschino cherries, and canned pineapple chunks. She brought this to her church bake sale, where it was purchased by the bowlful, and completely gone after a half hour. You questioned whether you were living in a parallel reality.