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Pretty sure this is a bar mitzvah and not people ringing in the New Year, but those kids still look like they're having a goddamn blast. You went to bar mitzvahs that were way more fun than the evening you've had so far. Even when Todd Schwarz threw up on your shoe. You got to sing "No Scrubs" on karaoke, so that night was ultimately a win. Unlike tonight. Why are you still in charge of making a playlist on Spotify? Why won't Jenna's bluetooth speakers synch up with your phone? WHY ARE YOU STILL AT THIS GODDAMN APARTMENT.