I’m sorry, that was a typo. I meant, that “Oh?” face. You know, the face they will inevitably make when you drop a line on them, like “I really want to, but I’m having a bad pube hair day. You understand, don’t you?” You’ll leave him wanting so much more. Probably some clarification, also.
6. Make them groan with some dirty talk.
As you embrace your partner, nuzzle your face into their neck, gently kissing up toward their ear while slowly reaching down the front of their pants. After giving a playful, gentle tug on their earlobe with your teeth, softly whisper the phrase, “Do you mind if my mom stays with us for a while?” and get ready to have your mind BLOWN!
7. Shake things up with some sexy text!
That online argument you just got yourself involved in 15 minutes ago isn’t going to fight itself! Sure, your guy is lying naked next to you, but if you walk away from the comments section, all those other commenters will view it as your passive concession. Plus, because this Disqus account is linked to your Twitter, you just cannot have that happen again! By straight up choosing your cell phone over your partner’s sexual needs, you’ll be sure to leave them masturbating alone in the shower. Me-ow!
8. Be a tease.
Slowly run your tongue over his nipples (yes, men also love nipple stimulation!), looking up at him occasionally. Once you’ve made eye contact, crawl up to his face, gently sharing the devastating news you just read stating that over 2 million dogs are euthanized in America’s animal shelters every year. Ask him if she would be into volunteering, together.
9. Keep him guessing.
After a hot and steamy makeout sesh, just as you start to tear each other’s clothes off, tell him you have to go to the bathroom, but then never get up to go. Just keep looking at him.
10. Keep your clothes on for a change.
I don’t mean “push your underwear to the side and have crazy, urgent let’s-fuck-in-the-backseat-of-this-Hynudai” sex. I mean “it’s really cold in there, you don’t wanna take off your clothes!” sex. Actually, will you hand me that sweater?
