Trump Returns

Though some might be shocked by what has been released of Donald Trump’s tax records, according to records dug up from the late great Blockbuster Video, his rental returns are even more eclectic and terrifying:

They include, but are not limited to:

Kangaroo Jack

My Super Ex-Girlfriend

Saving Silverman

Ladder 49


You, Me, & Dupree

One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest*

Marley & Me

A Boy And His Dog

Where The Red Fern Grows

Old Yeller




Shanghai Knights

Land Before Time IV

All The President’s Men*

Saw II

Saw IV

Black Sheep

The Shawshank Redmeption*

American Wedding


The Graduate*

Rocky V

V For Vendetta

Eight Men Out*

Weekend At Bernies

Citizen Kane*

Cannibal Holocaust

When his local Blockbuster closed, Trump had over 100 movies still out, including:

How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days

Failure To Launch

The Wedding Planner

Fool’s Gold



Get Shorty



Jingle All The Way


American Graffiti

According to Blockbuster employees who frequently dealt with Trump, he was not a model customer. “He rarely rewound the VHS tapes he rented,” claimed a former Blockbuster employee who requested to remain anonymous. “And he frequently left scratches on DVDs, Maybe because he couldn’t comfortably hold one using just one of his tiny hands.”

Can we trust a man with a Blockbuster rental record such as this one? This writer certainly thinks not.

(*denotes that the film that was returned without having been opened)

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