Can We Guess How Many Fucks You Give?

How many fucks do you give? Too many? Too little? Just enough? Take this quiz and find out … or don’t.

We don’t give a fuck either way.

1. Your roommate finished off the last of your ice cream and didn't replace it. You react by:

   1. Shrugging. Whatevs, you didn't need the extra calories anyway.
   2. Telling your roommate that he/she owes you $5 for some more ice cream.
   3. Keying that motherfucker's car.
   4. Jumping up and down like a child while screaming "IT'S NOT FAIR!" as tears and snot dribble down your face.

2. Your significant other dumps you in a text. You respond with:

   1. Your loss babe, plenty of other fish in the sea :-p
   2. Can't we talk about this in person? :-O
   3. Give me one more chance, I swear I can change! ;-(
   4. How can you do this to me? Do you want me to go back to cutting? :'(

3. Some friends want you to go out for drinks with them. You'd love to but you have to get up early for work in the morning. After weighing the pros and cons you:

   1. Say "Fuck it!" and go out anyway. If you get too drunk you can always call in sick. YOLO!
   2. Decide that one drink won't hurt you but only one ... two at the absolute most.
   3. Tell them you'll go along as the designated driver but you're not drinking.
   4. Lie and say your cat died so that they won't think you're a wuss for staying home. Then go and kill your cat to make your story legit.

4. Whilst hiking in the woods you come across a bear who looks like he'd rather rip your spleen out than calmly let you pass. Thinking fast you:

   1. Casually walk up to it and punch it in the face, then keep walking.
   2. Play dead because that's what they always do in the movies.
   3. Run away screaming as piss runs down your legs.
   4. You would never go hiking in the first place because of situations like this. The only bears you want to see are the ones on the Internet.

5. Someone unfriends you on Facebook. You react by:

   1. Doing nothing. You have more important things to worry about in the real world than social media.
   2. PMing them and asking why they unfriended you, it could have been an accident.
   3. Writing a vague, passive-aggressive status about the person that only one or two of your mutual friends will get.
   4. Actively flaming them on Facebook, Twitter, and any other social media platform you can think of. Even Google+ (though no one will see it.)

6. One of your friends jokingly calls you fat. You:

   1. Give them the finger while shoving a whole Twinkie into your mouth.
   2. Tell them you're starting a diet tomorrow.
   3. Never eat in front of this person ever again.
   4. Immediately run to the bathroom to purge yourself of all the cookies you ate to fill the hole in your heart where Daddy's love should have been.

7. Whenever you watch the part in Toy Story 3 where the toys join hands and await their inevitable death you:

   1. Bawl your eyes out and don't care who knows it.
   2. Shed a single tear, just so no one thinks you're completely heartless.
   3. Close your eyes and don't open them until the toys get rescued.
   4. You wouldn't be caught dead watching some kids movie. You only watch porn and NASCAR.

8. Your mother goes to give you a hug in public. You respond by:

   1. Hugging her back.
   2. Offering a hand shake instead.
   3. Stepping back and growling "Mom you're embarrassing me!" through clenched teeth.
   4. Shouting "Stranger danger!" at the top of your lungs and running away.

9. You're at work when suddenly the fast food you had for dinner last night makes it's presence known. You feel a major gas attack coming on so you:

   1. Let 'er rip. It's not healthy to hold in your farts.
   2. Release the gas slowly and hope it's not a squeaker.
   3. Get up and silently crop dust the room on your way to the bathroom.
   4. Hold it in until you get home. No one at work must know that you fart, poop, burp or expel any other waste from your body.

10. It's laundry day and the only clothes you have to wear are your old MC Hammer pants from 1991 and an ugly Christmas sweater you bought "ironically". Unfortunately you need to run to the store for some milk so you:

    1. Just suck it up and go. Who cares if you're dressed like a doofus?
    2. Throw on some sunglasses and grab a cane so people will think you dress that way because you're blind.
    3. Put on a trench coat. Better people think you're a pervert than unfashionable.
    4. Screw the milk. You can always eat your cereal with water and drink your coffee black.

Absolutely No Fucks

You give 0 fucks! No fucks whatsoever are given by you. You do what you want, when you want and you don't give a fuck -flying or otherwise- what anybody thinks. You don't let things upset you because that would mean giving a fuck and as previously mentioned, you don't do that.

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A Single Solitary Fuck

You give a fuck but only one. You care enough about what other people think to muster up one single, solitary fuck but after that they can go fuck themselves for all you care. You care a little bit about the direction your life takes but only about a fuck's worth, after that you can't be bothered.

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Several Fucks

You give between 2-4 fucks. You let too much stuff bother you and you worry too much about what others think. You are striving to live a fuckless life but you've still got a long fuck filled road ahead of you.

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All Of The Fucks

You give all the fucks. You've given more fucks over the years than Jenna Jameson and the IRS combined. It's like, how many more fucks could you give? The answer is none, none more fucks because you've already given them all. In fact you've given so many fucks that you have run out of fucks to give and have recently had to move on to giving a shit.

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Thanks to Reddit for the great gif.

Like this exploration of fuckery? Well then you might like to find out Is It Time To Take Up Zumba? :( and 33 Funniest Tinder Profiles of people that definitely didn’t give a fuck.