Can We Guess Why No One Loves You?

So no one loves you huh? Well you have clearly done something to deserve all the hatred. Luckily this handy online quiz is here to help you figure out what’s wrong with you.

How do you eat spaghetti?
1. Ask if the sauce is organic and if the spaghetti is gluten free.
2. Throw your dish at the wall because the pasta looked at you wrong.
3. Slurp it up loudly getting sauce all over your face, and fellow diners, in the process.
4. Exclaim loudly "This spaghetti sucks. It tastes like dog balls!"
When someone goes to give you a hug, what do you do?
1. Hug them back because, like, love is awesome and stuff.
2. Whisper to them that you shot J.F.K. as you slip half-eaten Snickers into their pocket.
3. Burp loudly in their face and then laugh about it.
4. Pull back and shout "Ewww don't touch me, I don't want your cooties!"
Do you love your Mother?
1. Not when she tries to do my laundry. I can turn those boxers inside out and wear them again.
2. No.
3. I love Mother Nature.
4. I love lamp.
How would you describe your fashion sense?
1. I usually wear whatever I find in the dumpster.
2. Backwards hat, Ed Hardy t-shirt, khaki shorts, and sandals with socks.
3. My pants keep barking and trying to bite me.
4. I wear a lot of tie-dye and hemp fabrics.
What kind of music do you listen to?
1. Limp Bizkit.
2. The Grateful Dead is groovy but so is Phish...oh and the Doors! Wait, what was the question again?
3. Grunge.
4. Insane Clown Posse.
It's Valentine’s Day, What do you get your significant other?
1. A half-eaten sandwich.
2. A rock on which I've drawn my face in lipstick.
3. A peace sign made out of seashells and some incense.
4. Nothing.
Your child has just fallen off of the swings and started crying. How do you console them?
1. Pull out clumps of your hair and screech like a howler monkey.
2. Pick your nose and start making fart noises.
3. Tell the kid "Stop crying like a wuss or I'll give you something to cry about!”
4. Cheer them up with some non-dairy, soy based, frozen yogurt.
What fictional character do you most identify with?
1. Jabba The Hutt.
2. Sid From 'Toy Story'.
3. Hannibal Lector.
4. Gaia from 'Captain Planet'.
You're with a friend who accidentally passes gas and is immediately embarrassed. How do you react?
1. I tell them how jealous I am. I haven't been able to break wind since the alien probe.
2. I rip one of my own and challenge them to a fart-off.
3. I can't smell a thing over my own scent of patchouli mixed with B.O.
4. Laugh and point while exclaiming "Farty-Pants here just shit his pants!"
How do you spend a typical Friday night?
1. Throwing my feces at the wall.
2. I get naked and join a drum circle.
3. Eating hot pockets and watching hentai.
4. Drinking beers and slipping roofies into other beers.