The birth of a child should be a joyous time in any couple’s life; sometimes less so for the baby itself. These thirty-eight children-to-be might find themselves wishing they were secretly adopted once they realize the families they’ve been born into. The worst pregnancy photos ever taken range from the absurd to the terrifying, and will make you wish we had a little more birth control and a little less body painting:

Thanks to Buzzfeed, Babble, and Distractify for some of the photos used in this gallery.

If you enjoyed these hilariously bad pregnancy pictures, check out our other galleries on awkward family photos and the funniest prom photo fails!

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