Nowadays every Halloween costume imaginable has a “sexy” variant. Sometimes it works – who doesn’t love a sexy nurse? – but sometimes, it’s a disfigured murderer or a character from a beloved children’s show and when that happens, the results are a little less sexy and a lot more terrifying:
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I love you, you love me, sorry 'bout that STD ...
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Somebody took the “porn” part of torture-porn a little too literally.
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What do you even call those, Beer Boobs? Tap Tits? Miller Melons?
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These two sesame creeps are brought to you by the letters S and M and the number 69.
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The new Kim Kardashian costume looks a little too lifelike...
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Who thought a pre-pubescent bald kid with depression would make a sexy Halloween costume?
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Didn't Bride Of Chucky already prove that even sexy dolls are creepy AF?
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You’d have to be ON coke to find carbonated sugar water arousing.
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What's up doc? Not my wiener, that's for sure.
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Someone got “sexy” mixed up with “pants-shittingly-terrifying” again.
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Know what’s hot? Sriracha sauce. Know what’s not hot? A bottle shaped costume with “Chickracha” written across it.
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Don't rub it too hard unless your first wish is for a pearl necklace.
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Goes from Edward Scissorhands to Lorena Bobbitt in the span of an awkward backseat handy.
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My childhood has the weirdest boner right now.
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Nothing says sexy like a child murdering pedophile with third degree burns!
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Thought nothing could be more offensive than all those memes? Think again.
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Is that a machete in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
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The first Halloween party you show up to wearing plastic boobs and fake pubic hair is probably also your last.
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I can’t decide if adding the mustache would have made the costume worse or actually improved it.
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Pro: She lets you stuff everything in the opening around back. Con: She has a husband.
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Sure, it seems sexy now but just wait until she throws up a half digested mouse smack dab in the middle of the humpty dance.
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Quick, someone throw water at them!
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#StupidFuckingCostume
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This costume smells like Axe, Jergens, and loneliness.
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Careful if you take this one home, she has a bad habit of disappearing between your couch cushions and showing up again a week later.
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it’s impossible to look at this costume without grimacing.
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"Sorry honey, they were out of Slave Leia’s but this is just as good, right?"
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Stay away from her Krusty Krab if you don't want barnacles.
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This costume makes her look like a big, pink starfish all right, but not the one she was going for.
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Kind of makes you want to build a wall around your genitals, doesn’t it?
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More than meat for guys...
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Contrary to the costume, this guy is actually a huge dick.
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Screw, or Screw not, there is no try!
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Enjoy this gallery? Then check out the best Halloween costumes ever worn and the funniest sexy selfie fails of all time!
